Functional•Sensual•You

[dale coba]

I incorporated your changes into my attempt to smooth the flow of language. I'm sure I made more changes than needed - take anything you like, anything that says what you meant, and flows naturally for you.

Dear Amelia,
As we discussed last week during our appointment, I have procured the requested information about the newly available technology to combat your cancer.
Please carefully read and consider this brochure from Kachi Medical, the supplier of the necessary prosthesis. The women are universally satisfied with it. Of course, that pamphlet is a bit of advertisement; but I have personally investigated the German hospitals which already perform this kind of surgery. Both physicians and patients are enthusiastic about the results.
Amelia, your condition has gotten worse over the last few months. We are running out of time, and you are left with this one therapeutic option. I have read the brochure myself and I recognize it is a rather drastic change you would undergo; but with all the good results my German colleagues had, I strongly recommend it. Please trust my evaluation and expertise. It is really the best treatment I can offer you.
I have confirmed your medical insurance policy would pay for all the expenses except the cost of the flight. As soon you have decided to proceed, I will make an appointment for you at the University Hospital of Heidelberg, Germany for the actual surgery. Your stay there would be about 3 weeks,. Further rehabilitation would take place in Boston. Please call me if you have questions.
Amelia, as always, I wish you the best of luck!
Yours Sincerely

- Dale Coba

[Silkscreen]

Thank you! I've posted an updated version with your text on the wiki.

[Silkscreen]

Sorry if I bug anyone who volunteered to help me with correcting my texts. It has become awfully silent, someone still interested to have her/his name on the list of people who helped polishing this thing?

[DollSpace]

Sorry if I bug anyone who volunteered to help me with correcting my texts. It has become awfully silent, someone still interested to have her/his name on the list of people who helped polishing this thing?

Still working on it, but I nearly got heatstroke yesterday, and I'm temporarily focused on the charity I work for, but I am aware of it. It's on my screen 24/7

[Silkscreen]

Still working on it, but I nearly got heatstroke yesterday,

Same here. Put myself into the bathtub with cold water in it.

and I'm temporarily focused on the charity I work for

<images DollSpace being an automated nun>

[--NightBattery--]

Still working on it, but I nearly got heatstroke yesterday,

Same here. Put myself into the bathtub with cold water in it.

and I'm temporarily focused on the charity I work for

<images DollSpace being an automated nun>

*Do you require spiritual assistance?*

[Silkscreen]

Oh, it's a viking nun. Even has the runic equivalent of the cross as the sign of her cult.

[DollSpace]

Still working on it, but I nearly got heatstroke yesterday,

Same here. Put myself into the bathtub with cold water in it.

and I'm temporarily focused on the charity I work for

<images DollSpace being an automated nun>

I put myself right in front of the A/C unit and drank lots of water till my systems were rehydrated. Plus, my pupils auto-dilate to nearly maximum anyway (it's a glitch I've not gotten corrected), so that played a part in it, too. I wanted to collapse on my bed anyway.

And me, a nun? Hah...then again, part of my family is Irish...*giggle*

Oh, it's a viking nun. Even has the runic equivalent of the cross as the sign of her cult.

And most of the rest of my family is Finnish, so Vikings are okay by me, too.

[LongTimeLurker]

Just wanted to chime in and say - very nicely put together!

[DollSpace]

Thank you VERY MUCH!

Just edit the text as you find mistakes. I would then run both versions through a diff tool which shows me which paragraphs I have to change inside the DTP software.

IMPORTANT: please do not insert additional linebreaks, the individual lines have to remain the same for doing the diff.

When you say don't change the linebreaks, the linebreaks will be different on each system due to whatever OS each user is using as well as the size of their screen, so out of curiosity, how do you define the individual lines, especially if we have to edit a word that makes it longer or shorter and therefore makes the line longer or shorter? I think I was a few pages in and realised that and that's why I'm stuck. So could you clarify what you mean by "linebreaks"? I just want to make sure I'm formatting this correctly. For example, I can send you an example (the first part after the letter, for example) and you can tell me if I'm doing it correctly? I just input it into a text file, but maybe I should be doing it on the board itself?

Please advise.
Danke.

[Silkscreen]

Oh, sorry. When you copy+paste the text blocks above into your favourite text editor, you should get overfilled lines where you have to scroll horizontally. The lines are that long because the line breaks in the above "code blocks" are paragraph breaks in reality. Depending on the setting of your text editor, it may insert additional "fake" linebreaks instead of horizontal scrolling. As long as these automatically disappear when doing a copy+paste in the opposite direction, it's all going well.

If it gives you a headache, just ignore that requirement. I will reformat it the way I need it. And yes, you could just copy+paste it into a

Code: Select all

 block of a board message.

Thank you very much for doing that tedious work!

[apok]

I like what you've done with this. A thoroughly fleshed-out idea, great image manips, and a superb graphical layout that really pulls off the corporate advertising style. Your effort and skill really shine through here.

[Silkscreen]

Thank you for commenting, though it is not completely done yet, as DollSpace wanted to polish it even more.
Oh, and don't forget Dale who has already helped me with the cover letter.

Maybe I repost it: choose a girl

Ute
Mareike
Saskia
Renée
Aiko
Karen

and a mode

cheeky
seductive
strict

for an additional manip/short story/roleplay invitation. Whatever you like. Others are invited to say their opinion, too.
And of course, even if you nitpick you'll get some nookie. Truth is, I really liked to think about Dale's objections.

[CyborgWolf]

Wow- this, this is something else
It really is the second biggest file on wiki i've ever seen! xD

Actually it's the first.
So much stuff.
Such majesty.

I love it!

[Silkscreen]

Thanks, CyborgWolf.

I'm still looking for someone who helps me polishing the English a bit. May I ask you?

[CyborgWolf]

You're welcome

And of course you can ask.
Hhmm, well I can certainly take a proper look through and check things with a fine comb, might be able to give it a go at the very beginning of next week but considering the time of year if I can't do it early next week it may be a while. So no promises of being any kind of speedy, but I'll happily have a go at checking through it carefully for mistakes

[spence2306]

Possibly the ASFR story I have been waiting for, first rate.

[Silkscreen]

Thanks!
There are some more pictures belonging to that story universe on the Wiki.
And I do roleplays in it, just send a PM if you like to play. Also having some more manips in storage for a roleplay currently running.

Any specific things you like to hear about KACHI? I may prepare another ad or flyer.

[spence2306]

Had you thought of a follow up where we get to meet Amelia after her visit?

[Silkscreen]

Oh, you got it wrong a bit.

I'm not too interested to write random stories about individuals. I want to write stories about human/robotic treats and features. The individual is only a plate where the yummy parts are served on. Because I want the reader to identify with the women in the stories, with each of them, a bit. I want the reader to be turned on by the robotic theme, by the description how to become a robot, by the descriptions what it is like to be a robot. These women are there to attract real women here on the boards to chime in, in the brochure Mareike explains it: why it was made, and how it has to be read. She tells it all at the very beginning. The cover letter to Amelia is another trick to draw a female reader into that reality. Why I want it to be read that way? Because I think we're terribly underwomaned here.

But maybe I myself got it all wrong and people are attracted because of ... ?

What has turned you on about it?

[spence2306]

Difficult to say. The big thing is that blend of machine and human which does it for me.

[Silkscreen]

Oookayyyy, that does it for me, too. As much machine and as much human as possible. I try to dance around that like some troglodyte witch dances around prometheus' gift to summon the demons of future technology.

[spence2306]

It does vary a bit but generally I'm of the mindset the more machine the better but still some humanity left. If some sort of sequel/ follow up story were to come that would be great but I suspect the time and effort to just put this one together was pretty consuming.

[Silkscreen]

From last November on I had a lengthy roleplay with a user new to the boards, aeodia. We both produced lots of text together (roughly 100,000 words), and I made also some manips for the play, but sadly she haven't got time to play any more.

She gave me permission to create a story from the transcript of our play, starting with a woman wishing to become a cyborg (incidentally, the initial posting she made here) and further, a woman exploring the KACHI company, its human and robotic employees, become engaged with it, and playing with peoples minds (read: my mind) there. I also want to continue the story further, of course, as our play have been interrupted right in the middle of action and there a lots and lots of other robotic, sexy things to tell.

What makes me sad, I was right in the middle of creativity when the play crashed, so I've been disoriented the last two months, trying to find someone else who likes to engage in a similar play, where I could circumvent all the obstacles I had accidentally introduced and replace them by well-thought peculiarities. NIL. Seems nobody is interested in that kind of play. I like to be more visible but I got the feeling I'd crashed on a sad planet where people hide under the surface and visitors are mostly ignored.

Oh, hey, and I got artwork. Unrelated to the above, maybe someone wants to play with me in that scenario?

[darkbutflashy]

Uh, oh.