Triangular theory of love

General chat about fembots, technosexual culture or any other ASFR related topics that do not fit into the other categories below.
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What kind of love would you have for a fembot?

Liking/friendship
11
13%
Infatuated love
14
16%
Empty love
6
7%
Romantic love
19
22%
Companionate love
18
21%
Fatuous love
4
5%
Consummate love
13
15%
 
Total votes: 85

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xodar
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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by xodar » Fri Mar 20, 2015 9:23 am

daphne wrote:It's interesting to me, however, that so many people desire "love" out of the machine which is incapable of such. By its nature the fembot can never truly love, even if it has emotions; love is given, not taken, and by design it has no choice in the matter.

You are quite right.. A machine simply isn't a living, rational and emotional being. It's a deliberate illusion created to make up for the difficulties current society as well as various persons' hangups impose on relationships, essentially to isolate the sexual function and make it possible at comparatively low cost.
Real animals such as dogs can participate in emotional and genuinely affectionate relationships with humans, and it's a human responsibility to return the feelings and take care of the animal.
But a machine is material on which one projects their concept of desirable personhood just as are fictional people and celebrities.
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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by ministrations » Sat Jun 27, 2015 12:01 pm

I've been meaning to respond to this for a while, but I knew I'd need like an hour to put my thoughts down. Sorry to come late to the party.

I think (with respect to anyone who may have said this earlier) that the question is more evolutionary than a fixed matter of philosophical debate. We're talking about technology here, after all. (Also bell curves -- there will always be people who want to marry their pillow or their mailbox, and while I may not see it I believe their feelings are real and should be respected.)

The very first fembots, up to about the hubot stage, will only be outlets for passion and/or intimacy -- probably not at the same time, and intimacy may be limited to "warm body comfort" levels of psychological soothing. Bell curves, again, but this is a one-dimensional stage.

The next stage is the one that most people on FC seem to want to explore, which is romantic or companionate. Even a first stage fembot would likely be capable at some point of fairly complicated anticipation and conversation, but this stage is a "real simulation" of emotional connectivity -- the ability to recognize a human's often complex mix of simultaneous feelings and respond accordingly, if not in kind. A Stepford Wife, or to use an example somewhat less charged with sexism, Cameron or the robots from Virus Alert or Soccer Mom Unit. Two dimensions.

This is the stage that gets the most support on here, and it's the one that the media tries to replicate most often too, albeit often failing spectactularly. I also think it's going to be by far the shortest stage if it even happens. Why? Once you have a robot capable of simulating "real" intimacy and "real" passion, you're really less than one standard deviation away from the group that would commit to their robot partners. That's why I think movies and TV fail so often, because the producers have to put such a large artificiality or control or sexist disclaimer on a robot character to keep it in this second stage that they either knock the robot back to Stage 1; fail and the robot stays too advanced; or create an inconsistency or continuity flaw that makes the character implausible.

Still, let's move onto the third stage, which is proper emotional reciprocation. This does not require personhood, sentience, free will or even a particularly realistic experience of emotion on the robot's own terms; all it really requires is the ability to comprehend, adapt and project a wide enough range of emotions complemented to its human partner (however idealized) to satisfy the human's ego and sense of self-worth while being conscious enough to avoid boring or deeply depressing him. It's what Maslow would call "esteem."

If you're saying "there isn't a lot of difference between Stage 2 and Stage 3," there isn't. Examples. Mike, Tammy and Anya in Robotman's epic. He feels genuine emotional connection to them, to the point of risking his death for them multiple times and appropriating Tammy's fears (for instance) as his own. That sounds like commitment to me, however nontraditional. I could go on, but the vast majority of fembots in our library are really Stage 3. When you have someone who can be realistically intimate and passionate, and isn't going anywhere, you're already 99% of the way to commitment.

Then toward the end of Stage 3 the triangle theory begins to break down IMO. For fembots, there's really a Stage 4, which covers persons (Cylons, V.I.C.I., etc.)...and there's a Stage 3.5, "actual love" or "vulnerable love," where the human and robot partner are indispensable to each other and the human sees part of the meaning of her life in the experience of her robot partner (addressing actualization on the Maslow scale).

This is important because these two stages are implied to be included in human consummate love, but are not part of the three main stages of fembot-human relationship because of the artifice of control. Stage 2 (romantic/companionate) can suspend this artifice temporarily for the benefit of simulation; At Stage 3 ("consummate"), the artifice begins to break down and control is more implied than presented; and at Stage 3.5 the artifice dissolves in all but the most extreme, nominal ways, at least from the point of view of the human. At Stage 4 you're basically dealing with another species that (probably) happens to look human; you're really on The Lost Levels at that point. The triangular theory may or may not apply.

I hope no one thinks I am trying to belittle their sexual fantasies. I am not. I have no idea what I would do in real life; none of us do, because none of us have the frame of reference. But I voted for consummate love, because I think the prerequisites for most human beings to have that with a robot will exist long before truly reciprocal relationships do, and will probably exist not long after a robot can pass the Turing Test in person.

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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by Esleeper » Mon Mar 21, 2016 12:15 pm

I picked consummate as well. I get that a lot of people would see a fembot as little more than a means to an end- a simple way to have a partner that could never reject you and can be made into whatever you want her to be, but I think that's missing the potential of what it means to have a relationship with a non-human entity, even if it's a wholly sexual one. I for one find the "mental" aspect of equal importance- the idea that this being who is almost but not quite human is still willing to accept me not merely in spite of the massive difference between my mind and hers, but because of those differences.

That being said, this is in part because I simply cannot see myself being attracted to a fembot that does not possess sentience- in my eyes, that would make her little more than an elaborate sex toy.

Xodar mentioned that a machine can only create the deliberate illusion of being a living, rational, and emotional being, and I can only reply thus:

If this illusion is so advanced and complex as to make it impossible to tell it apart from what we call the "real" thing, is the distinction between the "reality" and the "illusion" even relevant? I say the answer is a resounding "NO".
Last edited by Esleeper on Sun May 15, 2016 9:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by Murotsu » Mon Apr 25, 2016 6:26 pm

Without the initial sharing and friendship portion of a relationship with someone you really don't have anything. Sex alone, even the most passionate, heated, and incredible sex will eventually grow old. Besides, what do you and your partner do outside of sex if you have little or nothing in common? So, for the person that has odd, disparate, or unique interests it becomes difficult or even impossible to find friends, let alone intimate partners.

Then there is the person like Lucy on The Big Bang Theory. I'll use an example from a current show as you may be more familiar with it. She was an extreme introvert. How does a person like that get close to anyone?

So, enter the fembot / robot. A partner manufactured to be a mirror of you in a sense. A partner that understands and is not just willing but wants to do the things you like. Or, the partner that is as close or aloof as you feel is necessary. The better the artificial partner, the fembot, can become your best friend and your confidant the stronger your relationship grows. All you have to do is get past the knowledge she isn't an organic, flesh and blood, entity.

The animes Chobits and Time of Eve explored these concepts to some extent. Tonari no Robot, a manga does as well. This is because the Japanese version of robots works where these concepts can be explored unlike the "Hollywood" version. That is a topic for separate discussion sometime, however.

In the end, if a close human analog fembot were created, she would need to be your friend and companion first, and from that intimacy would grow. If she were designed such that she grew to share your own interests, ideas, and were a stimulating person to talk to, you'd find everything else flowed from that. So, if you were into sports she knows all about the game and watches them with you giving good commentary. Into art, science, nature, whatever...? She's there beside you sharing your love of those things.

A simple sex robot is an almost meaningless gesture. It's nothing but a vessel. The movie Cherry 2000 explored that in a mediocre way to a very limited degree. The Silver Metal Lover by Tanith Lee did it to some degree from the female perspective.
Having the option of getting a companion that is tailor made to find you fascinating and is in turn equally fascinating to you beats the hell out of a mindless "perfect lay" that never says "no" any day of the week.

That to me is the allure of this genera. The girl (or guy) that's always your friend. That likes the things you like. That isn't too intrusive but is never forgetful, and will be there.

Well, that's my take on this.

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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by Mixgull » Thu Sep 15, 2016 5:30 pm

I always felt that a robot whit no love programming will be very a very cute relationship

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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by lcy2007a » Thu Feb 09, 2017 3:39 am

I always expect to have a perfect robot girl to love. So for me it is the romantic love.

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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by fembot_stalker » Thu Aug 03, 2017 4:48 pm

As with me, it would not even be love at all, but I still voted consummate love because I want my fembot(s) to perform all kinds of maintenance/household duties, along with serving my sexual needs as well ... :mrgreen: :drooling: Besides, anyone who has read my signature already (and looked at my current avatar as well) knows my true intentions regarding robots anyway; I don't have a thing to hide at all, so what's love got to do with it? :?: 8)
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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by Venitia » Wed Aug 08, 2018 5:34 pm

I chose romantic love because I'd love and cherish an android partner :lovestruck: he would have a human appearance but he wouldn't have those awful human failings like envy, cruelty, greed..he would be so pure and lovely!! can hardly imagine a better life mate :lovestruck: :lovestruck: :lovestruck:

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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by Deep Blue » Mon Jan 04, 2021 9:37 am

It is depends on the intelligence of robot.

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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by Kube² » Thu Nov 02, 2023 9:39 pm

I always thought there was a strange gap between who we are and what our stories are.

When looking at the poll, I can see (to my great surprise) that a very large majority of the community would like a passionate romantic relationship and claim in the comments that they would take care of their robotic partner.

Paradoxically the vast majority of our stories tell the exact opposite. The robot is often a sex toy treated as such and ends up being destroyed... most of the time because the narrator finds it fun. I enjoy those stories but I don't feel engaged in them because it doesn't describe how I would react, or what I (and most of the community) would do.

At the same time I love sex and malfunction scene, even destruction scene as long as they don't turn into psychological torture for the robot, wich would be the case if she was fully sentient.

Ultimately I think there is a faint line where both worlds can coexist, on this line the robot is just sentient enough for a rudimentary form of romance, but not sentient to much, its still emerging and it can disappear during malfunction or destruction scenes. About those scene it seem obvious that Romantic/conpanionate/consumate love should not ending in willingly breaking the rebot, we are not beast, even near climax i'm sure most of us would stop before shorting out the fembot. But its something like 20 years i'm reading ASFR porn and I never see anybody stops, even once.

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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by 33cl33 » Thu Nov 09, 2023 6:51 am

Eh, it's not that paradoxical. Not everyone responding is likely to be a writer on here. And the question is about love, not what you want to see in a quick-hit piece of fetish erotica.

Plus, when it comes to media - depiction does not equal prescription. Putting something in a story, movie, game doesn't mean the creator is saying "this should be so" in the real world. Sometimes it's just for effect.

One of my favorite aspects of fembot stories is the reveal, and damage / malfunctions are an easy way to do a reveal that adds conflict tension. So I lean on that in my stuff, and the things I seek out for sexy purposes.

But should super realistic fembots become a thing in the future, malfunctions and damage would be obvious problems. Though I wouldn't be opposed to my sexy robotic companion having some subroutines that mimic minor glitches at certain private moments, in a safe way.

Fantasy vs reality and all that.
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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by Windblade » Mon Nov 13, 2023 7:07 am

I think my love for a fembot will be something between companionate love and romantic love, something in between. I will treat my fembot (or manbot :D ) with great love and care, she will be a member of my family (but I'm afraid that other members of my family will treat her like an object, hmmm, they don't like robots, especially my father), not a toy or something like that.

(yeah, I know that it sounds stupid and childish :D )

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Re: Triangular theory of love

Post by BebesIsPerfect » Wed Mar 27, 2024 6:57 am

In my fantasies, Fatuous Love is probably the closest thing I would crave in a fembot partner. Passionate love and sex with a sexy fembot without having to think about relationships. It's to satisfy my base, primate desires with my brain turned off, and move on. I see sexy lady, lady acts/looks sexy, Va-Va-Voom, things happen, moment over, Va-voom abated. This can't be done with real women, as this is considered callous and rude (not unreasonably, by the by). Consummate Love and True Relationships I reserved for Human companions. I share the opinions put here before by daphne, xodar, and dale coba, while acknowledging Esleeper's question: If the illusion is so advanced, is the distinction between "reality" and "illusion" even relevant? He says no, but I think yes.

Video Games are becoming more realistic, but it is still virtual reality, even with VR headsets. You are not really defeating armies, surviving post-apocalyptic plagues, or fighting an intergalactic rebellion (illusion). You are in your living room, or playroom, or wherever moving your arms around (reality). You sustained no real injuries from your ordeal, while your virtual avatar may have received many. Would you really want to share in your video game character's hardships, especially considering the gritty landscapes and emotional struggles prevalent in many best-sellers (The Last of Us, Red Dead Redemption, Atomic Heart, etc.)? I wouldn't and don't. However, you presumably benefit from the ordeal knowing that no one should have to suffer or go through such ordeals. It is a boon to be sure, but you wouldn't want to find out the hard way.

But this is a video games as an example, what about an actual sexual relationship with a fembot? What about kids? Do you even want kids? If so, would your fembot provide that? No*. (*I know, you may conceivably be able to order a robot kid, and with upgrades, it too would grow into a fembot or man-bot, but where does that leave the squishy human?). In my mind, the human cycle of life and death would end right here, which is a horrifying prospect to me if applied to reality. But since we are here in this place, speaking of fantasies, I fantasize about sexy relationships and a sort of quasi-romance with a hot robo-lady. In reality, they deserve utmost respect, and only when respect has been satisfactorily reciprocated by both partners, we may devolve into such carnal fun, having secured the safety of the species for another generation.
:hypnotized: I, for one, welcome the perfect, mechanical Bebe robots as Queens of the World. :hypnotized:

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